What no one knows about the Easter Bunny is this: when he comes home from a hard day of tricking children by hiding eggs and candy (he secretly hates children, if it’s not obvious), he blows off steam hosting an epic Easter Bunny Rave. Techno beats, a glowing rainbow disco ball chandelier made completely of gummy bears, lots of water, maybe some nitrous oxide (for balloons!) – it’s a hipster bunny’s paradise.
The roof, the roof, the roof is on fire! We don’t need no water, let the…oh, shit. Yes we do. The roof, it actually is on fire.
The sad thing is, I would eat my way through a mountain of charred Gummi Bear goo. Don’t judge.